For a while I’ve wanted to optimize SEO, clickbate, and traffic. Today I’m taking a step back and using this blog like I used to in the early days when I had zero idea what I was doing.
When I needed an online space to write and ramble, sharing my thoughts to the wild internet for strangers to judge, interpret, and ignore. All because I’m stuck. And this has always been a great vehicle for unsticking myself.
Financially, New Zealand has not been good to me. I spent most of my savings, borrowed money from my parents, and stand with zero liquid to show for it. Pay checque to paychuqe on a visa running out of time, in a world with mandatory border quarnatine’s.
My mind is split. On one hand there’s anxiety. No money, and walls that closing. If those walls close, have my sacrifices and choices all been in vain? Would I have gained anything from New Zealand? On the other hand: there’s this feeling of breakthrough. That same, overwhelming feeling of ‘everything’s going to be ok. I got this, because I’m Tyler fuckin’ Chase’ That attitude’s gotten me into as much trouble as it has success. I guess time will tell which of the two it’ll be this time.
What To Do What To Do?
Well. It’ll cost me upwards of 2,000$ to return to Canada now. But I knew this was a one way trip to Antartica or failure.
Asia? Its a fun idea, but with current finances and no online income, it’s foolish.
South Ameirica. Same deal as asia, only tougher to travel, more expensive to reach…
I need to stay in New Zealand for as long as I can. I can’t break or allow myself to sucumb to depression again. Breaking cannot be an option. Fortunetly its summer, and life is much better than it has been. New Zealand beat it’s third COVID scare. Returning too level one (Auckland’s in level two) and life resumes. I have a festival next weekend to look forward too.
I need to play the long term game and short term. New Zealand has been a unbalanced experience of focusing on one view or the other. In Dunedin, and those early days in Christchurch, I was too focused on the long game. Ace made me foolishly focused on the short term. Rebounding, I swung far too heavily for the long term. Never balancing what my plan, or needs required.
What to do? Focus ahead, and now.
We Gotta Edit. We Gotta Improve
I won’t lie to you guys. Since my ‘meltdown’ in September, I’ve gotten lazy. It’s been months, and I’ve been ‘trying‘ to get back to where I was, with no consistent effort. I never said no to sleeping in, and I’m yet to do a workout.
But most importantly. I need to reestablish the pillar of my discipline, and progress. This blog. My space on the internet to ramble and hold myself accountable to strangers I’ll likely never meet.
The area where I practice writing, and learn internet stuff like SEO, webdevelopment, analitics, widgets, and unkown unknown’s.
I’ve been lazy, and haven’t edited a post since the New Year’s. For so long, I was just pleased with myself that I was writing on this again.
But I need to edit. I need to hold myself to a standard higher than just showing up. I need to do my 5 W’s. There’s a lot of stuff I need to do.
So I’ll Start Small
The first thing, is to introduce new menbers to what I mean when I say 5 W’s.
There’s this podcast I love, Real AF. In it, the host has a system called the 5 W’s. 5 tasks that pull you out of your comfort zone, and push you forward. If you get them done, you’ve won the day.
The 5 W’s shouldn’t be dreams, or goals; like finish my book, run a marathon. They’re tasks that you 100% control over, that will move you towards larger goals/dreams.
Such as: Read 20 pages, Write 500 words, do 30 pushups, drink 3L of water. Small steps. Consistency makes these small steps MASSIVE. A leap or bound can be broken down into steps, and that’s what the 5 W’s aims to achieve. Making a Leap happen over the course of a few months. No luck, all control.
Hold Me Accountable
Too show my commitment to what I’m saying, I’ll post tomorrow’s 5 W’s.
Go to work.
Call Ace, sort missing payment.
Write on this blog, optimized for SEO, include two edited pictures
Edit 5 pages of the book.
Apply to three jobs.
When this is done, I’ll have built towards my momentum.
These past few weeks, with chaotic work and challenging hikes have been good, despite the existential dread. Now it’s time to focus and align myself with where I am going.